My Worst Baseball Year Ever

09.29.11 | Filed Under Baseball

I’m taking a break from listening to Kate Bush and Counting Crows to share my misery with you, dear readers.

Last night was simply devastating. I didn’t really understand what was happening to the Red Sox during September. I had been blessedly distracted by work and an amazing vacation this month, so the bulk of the damage was only revealed to me via box scores and highlights of other teams hitting home runs.

When I started watching games again this week, I just saw botched plays, missed opportunities and a defeated look in their eyes. Even as die-hard a fan as I am, I really didn’t think they deserved to be in the playoffs.

I had fears that something like this could happen back in June. Anyone who sat through the first two weeks of April could see that this team had pitching problems. It was masked by a powerful offense that had a tendency to go on ridiculous scoring streaks. When you score 15 runs in a game, it can mask that your starter gave up 6.

So now I must live with this taste in my mouth for 6 months. It’s hard to see how you fix this team, but here’s my 5 point action plan. In order of importance to survival:

Dump John Lackey.

I don’t care how much salary you have to eat, but cut your losses now. He can’t succeed at the level required here, or probably anywhere. Not sure if it’s a physical or mental problem, but I don’t care. Besides his epic failure on the mound, my guess is that asshole is poison in the clubhouse.

No really, dump John Lackey at any cost.

Not possible to overstate this point, so I’m repeating it. Honestly, all 5 points could be this one and it would be just as effective.

Curt Young needs to be demoted.

You just get the sense that this guy is in over his head. It would be unreasonable to expect a John Farrell-caliber pitching coach, but something has to change here. Even if for appearance purposes only.

Who is in charge of conditioning? Fire that guy.

You just get the feeling that the Sox limped into September. And not in a freak injury sort of way that plagued the team in 2010 … in a worn-down way. Like they weren’t prepared to play 162 games.

Someone needs to mention to Carl Crawford that his batting stance is ridiculous.

Seriously. Have you looked at it? I actually feel like we’re going to see a 2012 Crawford more like the one we expected. But his mechanics are ridiculous.

I don’t even have the strength to really root against the Yankees in the playoffs – although I will certainly follow the games. The Brewers look like a fun team, so I’ll probably root for them. My best guess though is the Phillies will take it.

I wouldn’t take what I say as gospel though. If fantasy baseball is any indication, I really have no idea what I’m talking about. I finished in the bottom 3 of all 3 leagues I play in.

Ok. Back to sulking.