The Official Release of the Urbanblight Report

01.16.08 | Filed Under Americana

I submit to you, the American Public, that Hillary Rodham Clinton has been a consistent user of steroids and/or HGH and should be suspended for the next 45-60 primaries. I heard about this from source who prefers to remain anonymous and has been granted full immunity, so I know their story is legit.

For my evidence, please look at this photo of Hillary in her youth, versus this recent photo.


Note the swelling of the head, as well as the irritability.

This would also explain her ability to throw heat at Barack Obama at this late stage of her political career.

Roid Rage would also explain her “crying” fits, as well as her campaign’s obnoxious position that voting to fund soldiers constitutes “supporting the war” … giving her and Obama “the same record” on the subject. Obviously he wouldn’t have voted for the war, considering the speeches he made at the time. That’s not in question. It’s a ridiculous, academic response to the fact that she (and most of the US) made an awful mistake that Obama didn’t have the opportunity to make.

Finally, it might account for her inability to apologize for that vote to go to war in the first place.

Really, that’s all I want.

Oh and anyone who isn’t named Bush or Clinton to be president.